You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
and she was petting her beer can
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Randomize
