my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Randomize
