It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
Randomize