dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Randomize
