You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Randomize
