How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
Randomize
