I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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