you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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