i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
