Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
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