is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
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