Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
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