Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
Randomize
