i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Randomize
