I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
