Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
Pi�atas plus fireworks don't mix well
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
Randomize
