she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
my phone is just a graveyard for last nights mistakes. at least it's giving me hints as to where i was though, i'm like carmen sandiego
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Randomize
