I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Randomize
