she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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