I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
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