Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
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