Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize