dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
Randomize
