Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
I spent most of the stoned conversation with my dad proving to him that the Newfoundland is an actual dog and NOT a Snuffaluffagus-esque figment of my stoned imagination, while laughing over the fact there is actually a place caller Dildo, Canada. Have YOU taken time to be a good dad today?
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
