Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
Did you just see the Batmobile???
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Randomize
