hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
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