bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
