Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
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It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
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I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning