Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(440): View more from Ohio

Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?

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(920): View more from Wisconsin

I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.

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(231): View more from Michigan

I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence

(415): View more from California

shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.

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(501): View more from Arkansas

Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!

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Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Read it at the TFLN blog
(919): View more from North Carolina

He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.

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(305): View more from Florida

Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.

(1-305): View more from Florida

God Bless cinco de mayo

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(309): View more from Illinois

Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much

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(901): View more from Tennessee

It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.

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(585): View more from New York

Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.

(585): View more from New York

How long will your dick be dry?

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