yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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