Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
