i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
