David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
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