apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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