careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
did i just pee glitter
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
Randomize