I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
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let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
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I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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