Me too!
I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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