it wasn't lemon gatorade
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
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