last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
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