grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Randomize
