i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize
