Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
Randomize