He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
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