That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize
