so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize
