I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Randomize
