why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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