Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
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