I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
