How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
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